Take the training wheels off

Fake it till you make it. I've been told this lesson all my life, but when I was at university, my ethics professor gave a lecture on confidence and how to speak up. His lecture resonated with me so much, I asked him to come speak to my business fraternity as well. I can still remember both conversations, they made such an impression.

 Well, here I am, four years later. I "made it" and I still feel like I'm faking it. What the hell is that about?

I have a really cool job. Not only do I work for a not for profit with a mission to make the world a safer place, but I, in the INFANCY of my career, get to work with the CFO and CEO, regularly.

Our company is going through a bit of a reorganization, my manager was promoted (deservedly so - woohoo!), and moved to a different area of the business. Although he assists me when I need it, the training wheels are off. As I am still in the middle of my budgeting processing, it feels a little more like I was thrown the keys to a motorcycle rather than bicycling down the way. What happens if I fail now? The road burn is going to be a lot worse now that I'm the one making all the decisions.

I've set lofty goals for myself and my organization for 2021. I have plans to create and improve processes and procedures, find better ways of working across the organization, and that's just the beginning. When I stand back and look at my list, the anxiety creeps in my throat as I think I've taken on too much. But hey, if I keep busy, who has time to dwell on that?

Someone with a critical role is leaving our company this week. I'm sad for the loss of his eight years of knowledge on the process he owned, but excited for the improvement opportunities. The critical business activity he performed is involved, system-reliant, crucial, and deals with the capitalization of assets. Due to the nature of this work, it has high visibility with leadership. As an individual who loves a challenge, receiving the frantic call asking for my assistance with the process as a result of the departure, I was flattered. Flattered that I was the first person that came to managements' mind when the notice was given. As they look to backfill this manager position, myself and the team member I ever so graciously voluntold to join me are going to be handling the day-to-day.

And at 24, I am (at least temporarily) the global process owner for this critical business activity.

So much of my motivation to thrive comes from the fear of failure. I've learned a lot since beginning my career post-grad nearly 3 years ago now and I’m still figuring much of this out as I go. I learn best by seeing and doing - until I figure it out for myself. It's worked so far, everyone keeps telling me I've been knocking it outta the park.

Moral of the story? Take the training wheels off, the more you fall, the faster you'll learn. 

-Laura Ann