The Bonds of STEM Sisterhood
Your mind may or may not be blown with what I’m about to tell you. Mine was blown not because I didn’t know this, but because someone validated it. I thought this for a while, but I thought I was just the weird one: You can be an advocate for the women around you without primarily having a friendship with them. Yes, it’s true. Sisterhood ≠ friendship.
I’ve been diving into the book It’s Not You, It’s the Workplace and while not a quick, nor easy read, it is riddled with data, facts, and evidence (with a TON of footnotes) about the interactions of women with their workplace. The first chapter debunks the “women are inherently competitive with each other” narrative while the second focuses on what the implementation of sisterhood does for women.
I started thinking about all the women that I work with and how they are truly my support system for all things around leadership and STEM efforts. They are such wonderful people and we share a deep passion for advancing the efforts of women in the workplace together. I then realized: we really don’t hang out or talk outside of work. I started wondering if I was considering them my sisters in the right way, until I read this quote:
“Sisterhood is about mutual support, not intimacy; cooperation, not confidences; shared purpose, not shared feelings. Sisterhood is an ethical, political, social, and economic relationship. It does not need to be a personal one.”
Some women, like myself, put a high priority on relationship building in their careers. There are some female coworkers that I know well and we can talk ad nauseum about their life. There are others that are my absolute rock and we’re lifting each other up all the time… but I know next to nothing about the finer details of their life.
Simmer on this. Who do you consider part of your sisterhood? My sisterhood consists of the people in the same arena that are able to help me make an impact. We exchange valuable information, give each other resources, cheer each other on, bounce ideas off each other, and hold each other accountable for our actions. I took a moment to really analyze this though. Most of the women in my sisterhood come from either A) my organization or industry groups or B) social media. Since many of us can probably relate to the former, I want to focus on the latter.
Social media has such incredible strength to hold us together if utilized properly. We have seen major developments in the way social media has evolved for different purposes, but have you harnessed its full potential? As of a year ago, my IG page consisted of mainly pole dancers and college friends. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that, but did it align with my life’s goals? No. When I realized I wanted to level up my career, that’s when I started searching for more purpose in my social media interactions.
Now, I follow various IG accounts that are STEM career focused. We interact with each other’s stories. We cheer each other on. We create community in our posts. While I don’t know each life story of the girls I interact with, I do know that we’ve got the same goal: sisterhood. We want to build each other up to make a concerted effort with our mission to advance women in STEM.
This might seem like an easy accomplishment for a shameless networker, so if you’re feeling a little unsure on how to connect effectively, here are a few quick reminders as you’re starting your sisterhood journey:
Compliment another - others love compliments especially when they are genuine and cheering people on is good for your own mental health
Don’t expect reciprocation – it’s nice when you get it, so appreciate it fully when it comes your way
Show value in your responses to their stories or their posts – don’t just like something or react, say what you liked about it
Corroborate their perspective with an anecdote or additional perspective – others love validation in the content they develop
Repost your sisterhood’s content – to make a larger impact, we have to be in it together
The circle is small and news travels quickly. Even if you don’t consider yourself a creator or entrepreneur, you can still add value as an engaged follower helping other women out! Keep supporting those around you. You never know when you might need to lean on your sisterhood network.
Looking for some accounts to follow? Check out the below for a few of my recommendations:
@engineeringgals – a community of women highlighting different engineering disciplines while encouraging others to share their stories and experiences
@chloetheengineer – a truly inspirational civil engineer heading up the #stompingoutstereotypes hashtag - and she works in power distribution, like me!
@ndakota_kate – a realistic experience of a NASA aerospace engineer who shares her travels and exciting role in the space world
@womengineered – an environmental engineer advocating for diversity among disciplines, race, and orientation
@amydeepkaur – a civil engineer, cofounder of @engineeringgals, and a great example of striking balance between work and life
@mrs.andrea.martin – an engineering executive and absolute powerhouse as a Yahoo Finance’s top 10 coaches for women in STEM
@stemgalnetwork – a network of women in STEM that focuses on turning your courage into action through real strategies
@adrianicolee – a lifestyle-tailored civil engineer who hosts the @youretoopretty podcast
Here’s to staying actively engaged in the sisterhood!
- Rachel
