Rebooting after burnout

I haven’t sat down to write a blog or formally, outwardly reflect on much throughout the past year. I haven’t felt much like working on my own business. I haven’t felt motivated to chase my dreams. I haven’t felt like the impact I was making was important enough. After these 12 long months, I’m finally in place where I can pick back up where I left off, but what this past year has taught me is self-awareness. I’m going to be incredibly vulnerable with this specific blog because I think suffering in separateness is where we lose our view on reality.

Last year in June, I put The Limit DNE mostly on pause due to overwhelm on my end. I kept a few clients on my books because it’s important to me first and foremost to make sure I am serving my purpose, coaching others. I stopped making content, writing, updating the site, sending email updates, and posting on social media because I was swimming in my own career turmoil. For lack of better words, I was having an identity crisis in my career.

As of April last year, I was still with my OG company, but in the tech side of the house serving as a SaaS Sr. Product Manager for a suite of software products. I was drinking from a firehose trying to learn everything I possibly could with a minimal software background. I felt pressure because those around me spoke so highly of me, and I didn’t want to fail meeting expectations. I had many nights where I couldn’t sleep and many times where I just broke down into tears at my desk because I just couldn’t understand why I felt so overwhelmed.

After the Fourth of July, my body/mind forced me to take an unexpected mental health day. It was telling me it had enough. Allow me to introduce the villain, a little word going around the professional community: burnout. I was so drained and unmotivated to do literally anything that I made an appointment with an online psychiatrist because the way I was feeling scared me. After I took a few days to myself and sought the help I needed, I started to make a slow comeback to my “normal” self, but emphasis on the word “slow”.

Fast forward to February this year, I had another bout of mental struggle, but this time it was straight up frustration. I could not for the life of me will myself to get certain things done. I was having to pump myself full of a ridiculous amount of caffeine just to feel something in my body to get me motivated. I made yet another appointment with a psychiatrist, but this time it was in person. Here’s the kicker: I was diagnosed with ADHD. Quite honestly, the last year makes perfect sense now.

My overwhelm in my new role last year was amplified because my brain wasn’t processing the tasks I needed to do with the right amount of weight, priority, and structure. As a high performer and extremely organized individual, you’d think I would have figured out a system to keep everything from getting at me, but I could have done all my due diligence in the world yet still have racing thoughts. Thank the universe for medication because my mind finally feels quiet, controlled, and motivated most of all without my own added internal dialogue creating pressure for myself.

I don’t have this all figured out yet, but I definitely feel ready to share my journey with you. I don’t have all the answers and I don’t expect I ever will, but I am adamant that reflecting on this in a more official type of way will help my journey. I have so much to share about my first year in the tech space, so I’ll be posting more about it in blog posts to come, but I wanted to take a moment to share the reason for the radio silence on my own time.

So why did I choose now to dive back in? Well, I have a new job at a new company, a new set of meds that helps me get stuff done, a new workspace in a new location, and a new sense of balance in how I think about my career. Even just after my first week of onboarding at the new job, I’m already feeling significantly relieved with the work culture I chose to make my new home. I get to continue working remotely, develop and implement go to market processes (my favorite thing ever), meet a whole new team of high performers, and make big impact… but when I’m done for the day, I’m truly encouraged to be done. And that’s what gives me the mental space to pick back up where I left off so I can support those around me.

If you gathered anything from this post, here’s the highlights I want you to walk away with:

1)      No one will hate you for saying “no” when you’re overwhelmed, life keeps marching on

2)      Seek help when you think you need it, especially when it comes to mental health

3)      Be diligent in your recovery and make sure you put in the work

4)      No one will judge you for revisiting a passion even when it feels like too much time has passed

5)      Show up for yourself and make sure you’re keeping yourself happy and energized

Thank you for your patience as I navigated some pretty tough times. Growth is important for increased insight and perspective, so I cannot wait to share what I learned with you. Here’s to starting the next chapter of The Limit DNE!

     -Rachel

What’s to come in future blog posts:

·       Building influence in a new team

·       Learning tech lingo and processes

·       Understanding what it truly means to be customer-obsessed in tech

·       Importance of being “fearless” in your professional network expansion

·       Navigating having a puppy while working from home (LOL)

·       Reframing your support function for different acquisition cultures

·       Stepping back to evaluate impact opportunity for your career growth

·       Interviewing externally and negotiating compensation

·       Finding a company to fit your (and your family’s) lifestyle

·       Saying “goodbye” to your network at your old company

·       Taking time between jobs

·       Differences starting a role at a much smaller company

·       And more!