Be A Unicorn

Want to know the biggest favor I ever did for myself? Being unapologetically "me” both inside and outside of work. Someone recently told me “Rachel, you’re a unicorn” and although I feel like we already know what that might mean, I wanted to unpack that concept more thoroughly.

My name is Rachel. I’m a Chicagoland native. I have an engineering degree from UIUC. I work in the power generation industry as a compliance engineer… and I’m a professional pole dancer. Nice to meet you.

Looking at me you’ll see an average built blonde with a bubbly personality. I don’t look like your “stereotypical” engineer. But let’s be real, what should the “average” engineer even look like?

When I meet people and they ask what I do, I always have to mentally prepare myself for the conversation. I can bank on the following phrase as a response to my job title “But you don’t look like an engineer.” Hold. The. Phone. If I’m feeling sassy I ask them, “Oh really? What does an engineer look like then?” I love to watch them squirm. Normally the response is simply, “Oh, I dunno, just not… YOU.”

I’m not just talking about “look” in the sense of physical features, but also mannerisms and hobbies you invest in. I feel like this is such an important ongoing discussion in our industry. Why do we have these stereotypes on what an engineer should look like? Most of the engineers I know are incredibly articulate speakers, great conversationalists, and have a really cool passion they work on outside of work.

What do they look like? WHO CARES. I know engineers that spend most of their time outside of their job building hot rods to race on the Wisconsin drag strip, that can bowl almost a perfect game while enjoying a number of adult beverages, that are basically the chef of the family every night of the week with a cool new recipe, and then there’s myself as the professional competition pole dancer. We don’t expect other occupations to be built the same, so why do they expect that of us?

I have an incredibly “extra” personality with a knack for shameless networking. I tried shrinking in to fit the job description, but it made me feel caged more than feeling like I was good at my job. Once I started embracing my ability to successfully “herd cats” (this is a phrase that keeps coming up in a lot of my accomplishments lately), I felt like I was making larger strides. Once I owned my skillsets that were built inherently into my personality, I have been able to offer far more than when I was suppressing my “personal” life.

And yes, I am a pole dancer. Having trained in traditional dance since I was 10 years old, it was only natural to gravitate towards the dance community again after college.

I started in a little suburban studio, and I said I would only do “contemporary” style pole dancing because I was afraid of the stigma attached to it. After I became an instructor, competed, and started working for a studio in downtown Chicago, everything changed. There was a completely different lens I was viewing this industry through. It was truly inclusive in every sense of the word.

They embraced every style, every body type, every age, every background, and anything else you could possibly think of. This community was incredible, and it only succeeded (and still succeeds) because of its careful, consistent, inclusive discussion. The intention of this studio was not just fitness. It was about finding yourself as a dancer and celebrating that together.

Many of the women and men that came into the studio were nervous their first time. We would hear things like “I’m not sexy”, “I don’t have enough upper body strength”, “I’ve never danced before”, and when (not if) they came to more classes, you would see their confidence and self-expression grow exponentially. If that isn’t a reward as an instructor, you’re doing it wrong.

Going into year six of pole dancing, I am a completely different person from year one. I have gone from shy contemporary dancer with a judgmental attitude to those without a dance background, to a community focused advocate for where our industry came from: strippers. No, it didn’t come from some Indian past time or the Chinese circus. The industry lives at it does today because of strippers.

I am so proud to know and to have worked with (still do) some of the most industrious minds I have ever met. I know many of these women as business owners and bad ass entrepreneurs that are out there hustling hard every single day. The type of work ethic, focus, and pride that these women exhibit is unmatched from any other industry. Without working with them, I wouldn’t be where I am today.

I think the most important thing I’ve learned from them is when my hobbies do come up, I don’t pull the “not a stripper” card. I take the opportunity to educate where our industry came from and how it’s important to be inclusive in our discussions about pole dancing. My whole argument, especially when I’m talking corporate, is “give credit where credit is due” and it changes perspective almost immediately.

I wouldn’t know inclusion in the way I know it today without meeting the fabulous women in our pole dancing community that have taught me so much. It adds a unique angle to my diversity and inclusion work both internally and externally to my organization. I don’t shy away from this topic, because it draws in more diverse sets of individuals to the D&I conversation.

As I progressed through my pole dancing journey, I found my true voice and have been empowered to own every aspect of who I am. I can only hope that others reading this find something that does it for them as well. It doesn’t have to be pole dancing, but a hobby that empowers you and builds your confidence. Honestly, I can’t thank my girlfriends in this industry enough. You have taught me so much more about empowerment than I think I could have ever hoped for. Shout out to the OG “Wild Things” if you’re reading!

Coming full circle, taking the person I am when I feel most confident (i.e. while I’m dancing) and applying it to who I am in the professional world has been the way I have felt the needle move the fastest in my career. Applying inclusive practices, motivation techniques, confidence boosters, and “game face” from my dance world to my engineering job has been the largest differentiator to move me at a more rapid pace in my journey to my ever-growing next level.

Unicorns are majestic, beautiful creatures (granted they are mythical). They stand out. They are vibrant. And now more than ever, there are a million t-shirts, mugs, etc. that all embrace being a unicorn. Do yourself a favor and take it to heart. You are meant to shine and the only person that can dull your shine is YOU. Get out of your own way and let yourself thrive in your confidence